Who In The World Is Cameron Esposito?: On fighter pilots and their baby bumps

About a year ago, a strange thing happened to me: For the first time, I began to imagine having a baby. Not raising a kid or parenting—I’ve always wanted to parent a child, and my non-comedy work experience only confirmed this. I worked in special education and loved it. Then I was a nanny for several years and my nannykid ruled. I’ve already helped raise some kids, which was very cool though surprisingly boring because, as it turns out, toddlers are the worst at casually chatting about action movies.

Now I’m thinking about having a baby. I’m thinking about growing a baby in my body and then somehow getting it outside of my body using methods I still cannot comprehend like pushing and what the fuck?! Never before had I thought I might want to carry.

I think part of this is my age—I …

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