Newswire: Smart-mouthed Amazon Echo will tell you how shitty you’re dressed

Ever since Cher Horowitz declared mirrors unreliable, people everywhere—not just budding fashionistas—have scrambled to find the best way to properly gauge their appearances. (After all, your roommate and bathroom mirror can really only tell you so much.) And since Amazon’s already providing them with food, drones, and fun, the online retail giant has unveiled a new product: self-esteem, or rather, a lack thereof. Introducing the new Echo Look, a voice-controlled camera that helps you determine your best look. It can take photos and videos, which you can then share with your other anxiety-ridden friends who are struggling to get ready in the morning.

Don’t worry about all the crap piled up in the corners of your room, as the Echo Look camera will blur everything but your clear jeans. We’re sure making videos of your outfits every morning will not in any way impede your …

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