Newswire: Howard Stern is sticking around for at least five more years

Delighting uncles, brothers-in-law, and “co-workers you’re friendly with but would never hang out with outside work” everywhere, radio host and former Fartman Howard Stern has signed a new deal to keep himself on the air at Sirius XM for at least another five years. The deal comes just days before Stern’s last five-year contract with the company was set to expire, and reportedly bounced the satellite radio provider’s stock price up 5 percent upon announcement to a Baba Booey-loving world.

2015 marked Stern’s 10-year anniversary with the satellite radio provider, which has hosted his iconically vulgar chat show ever since he was driven from terrestrial radio by an FCC sent spiralling into madness by the sanity-shattering vision of Janet Jackson’s naked breast. In the years since, Stern has utilized the company’s technology to keep our planet and mid-priced sedans comfortably filled with calls from …

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