Newswire: Chris Pratt says his new toilet is ruining his friendship with Nick Offerman
Chris Pratt appeared on Conan tonight to plug his new film Passengers, but he actually had something much more important he needed to discuss. Apparently, the once-strong friendship between Pratt and his old Parks And Recreation co-star Nick Offerman has started falling apart, and it’s all because Pratt can no longer take hilarious photos of his weird poop. A clearly distraught Pratt explained to Conan O’Brien that he, Offerman, and Adam Scott used to send each other photos of their particularly impressive poops while working on Parks, but ever since Pratt got a fancy toilet that “washes your b-hole” and automatically sucks down the poop when you stand up, he no longer gets a chance to snap a photo of his poops.
It’s not really the most tragic story a celebrity has ever told, it’s definitely near the top.