Movie Review: Fourth time is not the charm for the Fantastic Four

Why is it so hard to make a good Fantastic Four movie? Marvel’s first superteam, that yammering surrogate family of Silver Age aberrations, has now appeared in as many features as it has members, and each film is embarrassing in its own special way. The latest reboot, starring several overqualified actors, isn’t as chintzy as the not-intended-for-release ’90s version, nor is it as throwaway dopey as the two widely mocked Jessica Alba vehicles of last decade. But those adaptations at least had the good sense to embrace the pulpy, light-hearted spirit of their Stan Lee source material. This Fantastic Four, as misshapen as The Thing himself, takes a full hour to even grant its superheroes their superpowers. It’s shockingly humorless and glacially slow for a film featuring a bendy boy genius, an invisible woman, a human torch, and a talking pile of stones.

Just eight years after …

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