Great Job, Internet!: Talk of Chris Hemsworth’s abs derails murder investigation in Criminal Crimes

Above Average’s new Criminal Crimes series, which began on September 10 with an episode charmingly titled “We Found Semen,” is turning into a nicely absurd, deadpan parody of grisly TV police procedurals. In the pilot, stoic homicide detectives McGarf (Danny Jolles) and Keebler (Matt Rogers) graphically discussed finding “an ocean of semen” at a crime scene. Now, in “Look At That Body,” the easily-distracted plainclothesmen have made their standard, de rigueur trip to the morgue to have a chat with a no-nonsense coroner (Michelle Buteau) about the corpse of a murder victim (a never-better Matt Catanzano). The conversation quickly takes a weird turn, however, when the detectives become too-focused on the chiseled physique of the victim and spend far too much time comparing the dead man’s chest, stomach, and “shoulder definition” to that of Australian heartthrob Chris Hemsworth. In true police procedural fashion, however, the cops never stop …

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