Great Job, Internet!: No, seriously, which Disney villain would be best in bed?

It is a question every Disney fan must face eventually: Which of the studio’s many memorable villains would be the best, most satisfying lover? This is precisely the issue facing the pop culture mavens at Pajiba, who previously debated the sex lives of Harry Potter characters. Now, panelists Rebecca Pahle, Kristy Puchko, and Agent X have reconvened to speculate upon the bedroom prowess of Captain Hook, Maleficent, Gaston, and many others in a piece entitled “A Serious Discussion Of Which Disney Villain Is Best In Bed.” The conversation hits a snag early on, however, when the earnest commentators realize that some of Disney’s most memorable baddies are not exactly human, a fact that might take the conversation to an uncomfortable place. Take Scar from The Lion King, for example. “He’s a very swishy lion,” says Pahle, to which Agent X replies, “I just thought he was British …

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