Great Job, Internet!: If only Ivanka Trump had stayed with her ex-boyfriend, “Bingo”

Ivanka Trump’s husband, Jared Kushner, is often portrayed as either the president’s right-hand man, charged with everything from solving the opioid crisis to devising a solution to peace in the Middle East, or a cherub-faced dipshit who can’t stop colluding with Russians. In actuality, he is a bit of both, a distinctly Trumpian blend of incompetence and overconfidence. He fits right in with the rest of the crew.

But what if Ivanka Trump had stayed instead with her old boyfriend? You know, this guy:

Imagine if Ivanka had married her college boyfriend instead of Jared. His name is BINGO & he looks like this https://t.co/itIb13kGNV pic.twitter.com/PvogHBVT2a

— Molly Ball (@mollyesque) July 12, 2017

Lord, what a world that would be! James “Bingo” Gubelmann and Trump dated from 2001 to 2005. In 2003, he made a documentary called Born Rich, starring Ivanka—which …

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