Great Job, Internet!: And now let us read from the Bible as if it were written about Tombstone Pizza

File this one under: “Huh? I guess.” Some enterprising soul has decided to rewrite passages of the Bible to be about Tombstone Pizza instead of God, Jesus, and whatever other holy stuff is in there. The Book Of Tombstone is a Tumblr with multiple excerpts from an imagined holy tome that reinterprets events from the Bible through the prism of the sub-par frozen pizza. For example, this reading comes from Sausagis chapter 11, verses 2-9:

They said to each other, “Come, let us build a pizza that is 75% bread. Right now it is only 30% bread, and that is not enough bread for our pizza.” They used dough for the crust, and then used more dough for more crust, and then more dough for more crust. Then they said, “Come, let us put a little bit of sauce and toppings on top of this loaf of bread we just …

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